Being hoisted up in the air by the gentleman pictured above, is probably not how you saw your Monday beginning. I'd be irritated too - and equally not camera ready. Did they even let you take a brush to your tail? Ughh. State Tourism flacks are the worst.
With 13,000 people in the crowd, I'm sure you were slightly embarrassed. Hate that for you.
But, six more weeks of winter. Is that really necessary?
Seems like we might all be paying the price for some sour grapes of the NFL variety... Maybe you hail from a long line of die hard Eagles fans, and just hate to see the Steelers win the Big Game. Or you just want to get in a couple of more runs at Camelback. Maybe you slept in your contacts last night, making your shadow unmistakable. (Never a good idea, my man.)
Whatever your reasons - Candelemas will continue. Leave it to the Germans and their superstitions to put a damper on the approaching nice weather. (Not everybody wants to don their lederhosen and 100% wool Miesbacher jackets until April. K?) Just in case your middle school American history escapes you presently...Pennsylvania's earliest settlers were Germans.
Hey Phil - here's a thought. Leave a "thanks for the good times" note in your stump and buy a one-way ticket to Vancouver. You can still enjoy life in a fur coat and the Winter Olympics are fast approaching. Surely they have some work for a seasoned groundhog, as yourself.
Sincerely yours in a very chilly way,
Mrs. News Readin'
P.S. If you are looking to do a tell-all interview for television, do call.
3 days ago