Thursday, October 9, 2008

Not so much...

The Food Network ranks pretty high on mindless tv watching for me. Except when Rachael Ray is on...then Food Network becomes the most hated channel among the 851 we get. (Comcast, you kick ass!)

Rachael Ray drives me insane. The voice, the Oprah love fest, the talk show, the books, the Maxim spread, the Yum-o. All of it makes me want to cook 25 minute meals every night of the week out of pure scorn.

At a wedding a few years ago, we sat at a random table to enjoy the bride and groom's offerings from the mashed potato bar and their signature cocktail. (Say it with me...martini...you threw in some juice. Way to be original.) An older couple at the table started whispering back and forth and throwing their eyes my way. Did I have bacon bits on my face?

The wife leaned in, "Has anyone ever told you look like Rachael Ray?"

The husband chimed in, "You even sound like her!"

Oh, the rage. It was boiling over and Mr. News Readin' could see it and braced for a less than sweet response...through clenched teeth, "No, no one has ever told me that."

I am not Rachael Ray's doppelganger. We both have brown hair and brown eyes - that's it. AND my chest is double hers. (Like that's a difficult feat.)

Sooo...when I stumbled across this little nugget - well, you can imagine my reaction.

It wasn't one of despair.

8 comments:

Melissa @ I Pick Pretty said...

I'm with you; I totally don't get the big deal about Rachael. That level of unalloyed perkiness is unbearable. If I'm watching foodie TV (rare, since it just makes me starving), I'm watching the elegant, talented Giada.

I can also magically tell that you look nothing like her. The awful celebrity comparisons drive me crazy - I get Renee Zellweger a lot. Not that she's awful (well, she wasn't before she went berserk with the Botox and stopped eating), but couldn't people spring for a "Angelina Jolie" or "Grace Kelly" comparison just once in a while?

Ashley. Unscripted... said...

One of my technicians calls me Rachael. I have threatened his life if he continues to do so. He doesn't appear to fear me, but he should. He says, "oh it's a compliment." No. It's. Not.

News Readin' Wife said...

Apparently, I care so little about her I refuse to write her name correctly.

Grudgingly - I changed it.

Renee Zellweger always looks like she just got finished with a good cry.

Which I'm sure Pretty does not look like that at all!

There is nothing complimentary about the Ray. Ashley, I would put the tech. on disciplinary probation until he comes up with a better show-folk comparison.

Capegirl said...

Yes yes yes- but Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee also drives me insane. I want a nice table, good food and not some stage set.

Olivia: (mostly) Happy Homemaker said...

Love Food Network but Emeril and Rachael require a channel-surf. I actually think they would be great friends to have (in person) but I do not enjoy watching them on TV. At. All.

Giada (mainly) and Paula (occasionally) are my gals.

The Mrs. said...

Good God thank you. I hate her so much. The yum-o? DUMB-O!

just a girl... said...

oh lord cracking me up. Yes I too am a rachel ray hater. I cant stand to hear her voice much less look at her, but then I dont get oprah either.

Anonymous said...

I HATE HER!!!!!

She is a long standing, sore subject. She should have never been given a show. Let alone 2 and a magazine.

The one time I ever made one of her recipes my husband asked me never to again. And I ate none of what I made.

She is just so fake!